Time banks

So I was looking on the internet the other day and found this site:

http://www.mtdn.org/main.asp

And it goes a long way into my thinking of how society can work without the need for the current monetary system that we have now.

Now, I know it is against all things capitalist to think that money is NOT the only measure of worth, but hey, I am an idealist after all. :)

Here is a link for more information that explains how the non-monetary economy affects the monetary economy and the ramifications if it didn't exist.

http://www.mtdn.org/images/pdf/nonmonetary.pdf

What I find encouraging about this project is that the variety of skills available and offered for the time-dollars.

And the one thing that I am encouraged by and plan on doing is offering my time on things that I would never have an outlet otherwise.

Some of the things that I can offer as skills would go unused and uncompensated. But with the time-dollar idea, I can offer an hour of my time for another's hour's worth of time. I can offer my computer skills, my math/physics skills, my proof-reading skills, and I am sure others that I haven't even thought about yet.

Usually I offer my time for free to my friends, which of course I still will within reason, but now have a way to not only support my community but also benefit myself while using skills I would not be able to benefit from otherwise.

Ah well, I am repeating myself.

Think about the ramifications of you getting to know your neighbors and offering constructive skills to the community for your and their benefits.

Horribly Rude Jokes

So I have been in a weird mood the past day or two. So to share in my mood I offer some really bad rude jokes that will be sure to offend!

WARNING: If you are easily offended or have a weak stomach, do not read any of these jokes!












<---------- Here we go ------------->

Question

What is the difference between and onion and a hooker?

You don't cry when you cut up a hooker.

*******************

Blind Herbie

Little Herbie had been blind since birth. One day at bedtime, his mother told him that the next day was a very special one.

If he prayed extra hard, he'd be able to see when he woke up in the morning.

The next morning she came into Herbie's room to make sure he'd prayed hard the night before.

'Well then, open your eyes and you'll know that your prayers have been answered.'

Little Herbie opened his eyes, only to cry out, 'Mother! Mother! I still can't see!'

'I know, dear,' said his mother. 'April Fool!'

*******************

Bouncing Baby

A young mother had just given birth to a newborn baby and the nurse was congratulating her when the doctor came in bouncing the baby from hand to hand like a basketball.

"Here's your baby, maam" says the doctor.

The doctor then throws the baby on the floor, hurls it up against the wall, picks it up and twirls it around several times, and then drop kicks it straight out of the 10th floor window.

Totally bewildered, the woman gives out a loud shriek and hollers, "My God!!! What have you done to my baby?!?!!!"

The doctor chuckles a little to himself and says, "April Fools!!! He was already dead!"

*******************

Gold medal

What's better than winning the gold medal at the special olympics?

Not being retarded!

*******************

Hot Tub Riddle

What is the prudent thing to do when someone has an epileptic seizure in a hot tub?

Toss in your laundry.

*******************

How do you make a dead baby float?

How do you make a dead baby float?

Two scoops of ice cream and one scoop of dead baby.

*******************

Leper at the World Series

A guy with leprosy wins tickets to see the world series. But when he gets there, he has trouble finding a seat because pieces of him are peeling and flaking off, and he's very concerned about grossing out the other fans.

The leper wanders through the bleachers looking for a seat where his grotesque appearance won't disturb anyone else. Finally he finds an open seat where he might be able to watch the game. He asks the man in the adjoining seat if it would be okay to sit there.

The man answers, "Yeah. Just sit down, shut up, and watch the game."

The leper sits down and adds, "As you can see, I have leprosy. If it disturbs you, I will move."

"It doesn't bother me. Just shut up, and watch the game."

A while later, during the fourth inning, the man suddenly vomits. Frothy beer, hot dogs, and peanuts are splattered everywhere.

Seeing this, the leper gets up and says, "Thank you for allowing me to sit next to you, but I can see that my appearance has caused you to get sick. I will find another place to sit."

"It's NOT you. Just sit down, shut up, and watch the game."

So the leper sits back down. But during the sixth inning, the man begins to vomit again. This time it is projectile vomitus.

A powerful blast of beer and pretzels shoots out from the man's mouth and nose until is stomach is completely emptied.

Seeing this, the leper gets up and says, "Thank you for allowing me to sit next to you, but I can see that my appearance has caused you to get sick. I will find another place to sit."

"Really, it's NOT you. Just sit down, shut up, and watch the game."

So the leper sits back down. But during the seventh inning, the man begins to vomit again. This time it is the dry heaves.

The leper feels absolutely awful at the sight of this man suffering. And once again, the leper offers to leave.

But the man insists, "Really, it's NOT you."

So the leper asks, "Well if it's not me that is making you so sick, that what is it?"

"It's that guy behind you. He keeps dipping his nachos in your back."

*******************

The Bowl of Chili

Well, there was this truck driver that had been driving all day and hadn't stopped for lunch or anything and he was getting REAL hungry. He sees this diner and pulls in, walks up to the counter and sits down by this old biker who was staring at a steaming bowl of chili.

The waitress comes up and asks the trucker what he'll have and he looks at that chili and says, "Lady, I am starving to die, here, that chili looks good, I'll have that."

The waitress goes off and comes back with the trucker's steamy bowl of chili that he promptly gulps down. Not satisfied yet, he looks over at the biker who is still staring at his chili. The trucker tells him, "hey, I'm still kind of hungry, if you're not gonna eat that, may I?" and the biker slides the bowl of chili toward the trucker.

Well, the trucker takes his time with this bowl. He gets about half way down and there's this big greasy dog turd in the bowl. The trucker proceeds to barf everything back into the bowl and the biker says, "yep, that's as far as I got, too!"

*******************

Knitting In The Waiting Room

Three women were in the waiting room of a gynecologist, and each of them was knitting a sweater for their baby-to-be. The first one stopped and took a pill.

"What was that?" The others asked her.

"Oh, it was Vitamin C - I want my baby to be healthy." A few minutes later, another woman took a pill.

"What was that?" the others asked.

"Oh, it was iron - I want my baby to be big and strong."

They continued knitting. Finally the third woman took a pill.

"What was that?" the others asked her.

"It was thalidomide," she said, "I just can't get the arms right on this fucking sweater!"

Turbulent

Turbulent

Alone

And I think of you
Too many times

The good and the bad
And the soft and the hard
All of you

Roiling in my head
The images of you
My thoughts not my own
Yet here they are

Taken from me
Your flesh gone cold
As mine does now
The metallic taste
As I bite back my scream

A hollow shell
Of the man I once was
To the beast I have become
And the hate
The keeps me alive
For now

For my revenge
Will be soon
And swift
And I will feel
His heart stop in my hands
For the things he has done
And the pain he has caused

It was not our time
To be apart
But we will be together
When the deed is done
And the dead man
Walks no longer

The whetstone sharpens
My implement of death
My tool of destruction
It will be done
Soon enough

And I see him
It is time
At last he will pay
And my soul shall rejoice

Shadows conceal
And I strike the death-blow
It is done and it is good

I have killed
For my one true love

I have killed myself for killing you.

Competitiveness

In the past, I was very, very competitive. It got to the point where I would get angry at the slightest thing that I found to be unfair, or when people were better at something than I was.

That made me not such a nice person to be around. :)

In any event, the point is that I spent so much time either trying to one-up other people or get angry about not being able to. I am sure it cost me some friends.

Thankfully I got better.

Granted, I am still not perfect at it, but now it has more to do with sports on TV than anything else.

I can now enjoy playing basketball for the fun of it and not get angry about missing a shot or losing a game.

Well, here is a little story that happened tonight that I find amusing from my new perspective:

I was at a surprise birthday party for a friend of mine (DH8's girlfriend) and was having a good time. At some point there was a balloon fight with long, ribbed, colored, balloons. Don't ask me how it got started but it did. :)

Anyway, toward the end it actually became a competition, as I perceived it, between me and CS.

Apparently he currently needs to one-up me for some reason, but that's ok. No biggie on my end. I just find it kind of amusing.

CS is an expert in Scottish swordsmanship and I have not done much swordplay. So it appeared that CS was attempting to assert his dominance in long, ribbed, colored, balloon fencing over me.

The funny thing is, I really didn't care. It's a fucking balloon. I don't mind being hit in the head with one. Not much speed you can generate with a balloon.

Anyway, towards the end he was getting several good shots in on me. Probably half of them hit me somewhere other than my balloon sword.

I said, "I guess my defense needs some work."

He said, "I had my eyes closed the whole time."

To which I replied (and was in fact true), "I wasn't moving my balloon."

*grin*

Not sure this came out the way it played in my head but I thought it was amusing.

Basically, if it was not a serious situation, I am not going to take it as a serious situation. If we were using real weaponry, damn straight I would defend myself. But we weren't and they were balloons. Big deal. :)

So long story short (too late now I know): I hardly get competitive any more unless a real situation arises. I take things for fun and if I win I win, if I lose I lose.

I do not need to defend myself when challenged in a non-serious (to me) situation. Guess that's why I am so laid back now. And I just find it amusing that people are wanting to challenge me. AZ mentioned it last week and I am noticing it more and more recently. I'll figure out what that means some other time.

Ah well, I think I have rambled on too much. :)

Touché!

Holy Bullsh*t

Are you kidding me?

Check out this site and make me believe this is a gag, a joke, something other than what I think it is.

http://objective.jesussave.us/kidz.html

It is totally pathetic and very, VERY disturbing.

It pains me extremely to see this blatant attempt of brain-washing.

"Believe us, we know because God talks to us!"

"We are the way, because we say so!"

"Don't think for yourself, only do what we tell you to do!"

*grumble*

Or maybe I am just reading too much into it and it is just a harmless website.

You decide.

Or believe me because I said so! :P

Speed of Time

I have never been so attuned to how slow time can go.

It basically feels like I am waiting for something or should be doing something but I am not. Mainly it has to do with perhaps dealing with some withdrawals of nicotine. But a lot of it has to do with not taking breaks the same way.

I used to go have breakfast, then go smoke.

I would work a few hours, then go smoke.

I would go have lunch, then go smoke.

I would work a few hours, then go smoke.

I would drive home, and smoke.

So as you can see, there is a theme to that. Each time that I went out to smoke, it was about 10 minutes.

So I seem to have added about 45-60 minutes to my day that used to be just smoking.

And it seems that my routine is all borked.

It feels, right now, that it is 4pm and only an hour or so to go before I head home. That sucks so much!

That is the one drawback that I have so far. What the hell to do with myself if I am not taking breaks any more.

I could just sit in the cafeteria and not do anything. Yee haw.

I could sit at my desk and read/write blogs. Which seems to be the case right now. :)

The problem is that I need to find time away from the computer to rest my eyes from working.

So, non-smokers, what the hell do you do for breaks? Sit around and stare at the wall?

Anyway, almost over the physical addiction, just dealing with the psychological ones now. :)

So far so good. I think. :P

Last One (I hope)

So I am currently smoking my last cigarette, I hope.

I am doing it for many reasons:

1) I want to. It is time and I hate having to drink lots of liquid to keep my throat from being dried out.

2) It's spring. I plan to be doing much more activity and being out more. I don't want to be out of breath and I need a change.

3) It's good for me. Yeah, it's the last one because that has never been a reason why I should quit. It has always been a nagging point by some non-smokers/ex-smokers and when I am told what NOT to do, I do it more. Go fig.

Anyway, I have some concerns that the weight gain that goes with quitting smoking will be an issue. But with some hard work on my part, I should be able to keep it off and keep my downward gains I have achieved over the past year or so.

It is a matter of will for me to do this and I pride myself on my force of will when I set my mind to something. So far so good.

I also am concerned about all my smoking friends. Well a little bit anyways. I still will go out to "smoke" if only to be social. I also will have to decrease my alcohol intake because that seems to be one of the things that I associate with smoking.

In any event, wish me luck, if you care to. Though my luck in many things isn't that good, it will still be necessary perhaps. :)

I have spent most of the day attuning to my body and what triggers my urge and frankly I have been only smoking because that is what I usually do after I eat or drink alcohol. Very little urge actually. So I am confident it will work out.

The Boobification of America

And not the good kind either. :)

So at work today there have been too many people talking about some such-and-so TV show, mostly about NASCAR or "The Swan" or "American Idol" or NCAA Tournament or any other number of things.

And it occurred to me, "I wonder what TV show the CEO watches."

I bet he doesn't watch any of those. I bet, if he watches TV at all, it is the news or the market report.

I have come up with an equation:

(Amount of money you make) ~ (1 / hours of TV you watch)

Basically the more money you make, the less you watch TV. Or the other way, the less money you make, the more TV you have to entertain yourself with to stop realizing how bad things are.

You have to boobify yourself by watching the "boob tube" to numb the effects of being poor or not having a life.

I rarely watch TV any more and it is this realization, among many, that makes me not want to numb myself to my life. I am spending so much more time with my friends or reading books or the web (mostly non-fiction) or listening to music.

That's the key. Once you realize that the TV is rotting your brain, the easier it is to get away from it. And it's a continuing process or decay. The more TV you watch, and the edutainment or entertainment or newstainment or whatever you watch, the more it is going to make you rot.

You have to stop watching the fake news and read the real news online. You have to stop sitting on the couch and watching the tube and go out, see the sun, visit friends, do something other than dying in your own living room.

The more you become a boob, the more easily the people feeding you the TV crap will make you think what they want you to think rather than what you want to think.

It is a form of brain-washing. The more something is repeated the more it becomes "the truth", whether it is or not.

Turn it off, do something else and wake up!

Attitude

So it seems that my new positive attitude is getting on people's nerves. Not sure why that is exactly. Some of it might be their own fears, some of it might be I am being too aggressive and some of it is something else.

I can't do anything about the first.

Some people either have gone through what I am going through, probably much earlier in some cases, and know that the high will go away at some point. But I don't think I should not enjoy myself for the sake of knowing it will be going downhill eventually.

That's kinda negative and I am not all into that right now. :)

The aggressiveness I can control, but should I have to? Maybe to the point of not alienating my friends but I am feeling good, I want to express it because that's how I am. :)

It's not really a negative aggressive per se but I am determined in speech and action. I am very straightforward with most people and it might be grating telling people the truth as openly as I have been recently.

Obviously I don't want to piss people off, but I am not going to try to pleasure people at my own expense. That's the whole thing about being an egoist. Do it for yourself.

So my dilemma right now is, how much positive vibes can I give off without making people uncomfortable. People generally don't express themselves in ways I can pick up on very well, so I do appreciate my friends telling me how they feel.

As to the unknown reason, it remains unknown. Hopefully I am not pushing any friends away by being myself by being more open about it.

Though I would miss anyone who chooses to not like my attitude, it might be for the best in the long run. Or they might figure that they want me in their lives.

Hopefully it all works out. :)

Feel-Up Day

Today is officially Feel-Up Day.

Since I have been feeling myself up again today (wearing my new silk shirt) I have decided to declare that it is Feel-Up Day.

The tradition is as follows:

Feel yourself up as often as you like, all day.
Feel someone else up as often as they let you, all day.

I prefer doing it with silk shirts, but I am sure there are other fine fabrics out there that also feel nice.

I am free all night if anyone is interested in me feeling them up. And of course, I will oblige you if you decide to participate. :)

I am always up for a good feel, either way, so all you have to do is offer.

I love holidays! :)

Except of course the whole family get together, buy presents, or eat gobs of food ones. Those can get annoying.

Who are you?

So, I am a little curious about who reads my blog. Either randomly or regularly.

The regulars who respond I pretty much know already, but I am curious as to who visits.

No real reason why I ask, just curious. Though it is rather selfish of me to find out who my secret or not-so-secret readers are.

I tend to write about lots of different things at different times so having a consistent voice apparently is not my thing. So my retention rate is probably pretty low depending on what people are looking for.

Hmm, if you do respond with who you are, let me know what you liked or disliked on the blog as far as topics. Maybe I can streamline a bit and give some pleasure as to what I am thinking about different topics.

Or, hardly anyone will respond and I will do what I like. Not that I plan on changing what I write for my readers but maybe I will be more topical more often.

Who knows. :)

Can you tell that I can't think of anything else to write right now? :)

Corporate sis-boom-blah

I went to an all employee meeting today at work.

Oh my god.

It was so pathetic.

They talked about how everyone was doing a great job! Go team!

They talked about the company making profits! Go team!

They talked about everyone having high ethics! Go team!

They talked about how we'll have great sales this year! Go team!

They talked about the blueprint for a billion! Go team!

All you have to do is work harder, follow these stringent, life-sucking, creative-drowning processes, and get a measly 3% raise! Go team!

I didn't stay for the Q&A session with the CEO. I KNOW I would have asked this question:

So as the revenue of the company grows, how much will the employees share in this increase?

Answer: You get 3% of your salary you fuck heads! Go team! While I, of course, get that same 3%...somewhere on the order of $100,000! Go me!

Fuck you, you bastard!

It kills me how all the sheeple in the company (most of them anyways) cheer and clap and laugh at his terrible excuse for jokes. They are all getting the shaft unless you have a C*O in your title, or a VP or even Director. Everyone else gets shafted.

I am sick and tired of facilitating this kind of corporate bourguoise robbery of the "leaders" over the "followers".

I had half a mind to punch him out. :)

He is just a human after all. Big bankroll or not.

Now if they started treating everyone else as humans rather than assets the world would be better off.

*grumble*

99 things about me

Guess I will give this a go. :)

INSTRUCTIONS:
1. Copy this whole list into your journal.
2. STAR/BOLD the things that are true about you.
3. Whatever you don't STAR/BOLD is false.

01. When I was younger, I made some bad decisions
02. I don't watch much TV these days
03. I love olives
04. I love sleeping
05. I own lots of books
06. I wear glasses or contact lenses
07. I love to play video games
08. I've tried marijuana
09. I've watched porn movies
10. I have been in a threesome
11. I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship
12. I believe honesty is usually the best policy
13. I have acne free skin
14. I like and respect Al Sharpton
15. I curse frequently
16. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year
17. I have hobbies
18. I've been told I: (women) have an applebottom, (men) am packing.
19. I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me
20. I'm really, really smart
21. I've never broken someone's bones
22. I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal
23. I hate the rain
24. I'm paranoid at times
25. I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free
26. I need money right now
27. I love Sushi
28. I talk really, really fast - Fast anyway, maybe not really really fast.
29. I have fresh breath in the morning
30. I have semi-long hair
31. I have lost money in Las Vegas
32. I have at least one brother and/or one sister
33. I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
34. I shave my legs (females) or face (males) on a regular basis
35. I have a twin
36. I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyes in the past
37. I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
38. I like the way that I look
39. I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months
40. I know how to cornrow
41. I am usually pessimistic
42. I have a lot of mood swings
43. I think prostitution should be legalized
44. I think Britney Spears is hot
45. I have cheated on a Sig. O. in the past
46. I have a hidden talent
47. I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have
48. I think that I'm popular
49. I am currently single
50. I have kissed someone of the same sex
51. I enjoy talking on the phone
52. I practically live in sweatpants
53. I love to shop
54. I would rather shop than eat
55. I would classify myself as ghetto
56. I'm bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders
57. I'm obsessed with my Diaryland.
58. I don't hate anyone. I dislike them.
59. I'm a pretty good dancer
60. I don't think Mike Tyson raped Desiree Washington
61. I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother
62. I have a cell phone
63. I believe in God
64. I watch MTV on a daily basis
65. I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months
66. I love drama
67. I have never been in a real relationship before
68. I've rejected someone before
69. I currently have a crush on someone
70. I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life
71. I want to have children in the future
72. I have changed a diaper before
73. I've called the cops on a friend before
74. I bite my nails
75. I am a member of the Tom Green fan club
76. I'm not allergic to anything
77. I have a lot to learn
78. I have dated someone at least 10 years older or younger
79. I plan on seeing Ice Cube's newest "Friday" movie
80. I am very shy around the opposite sex
81. I'm online 24/7, even as an away message
82. I have at least 5 away messages saved
83. I have tried alcohol or drugs at a party
84. I have made a move on a friend's Sig. O. in the past
85. I own the "SouthPark" movie
86. I have avoided assignments at work to be online
87. When I was a kid I played "the birds and the bees" with a neighbor or chum
88. I enjoy country music
89. I would die for my best friends
90. I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza
91. I watch soap operas whenever I can
92. I'm obsessive, anal retentive, and often a perfectionist
93. I have used my sexuality to advance my career
94. I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all
95. I know all the words to Slick Rick's "Children's Story"
96. Halloween is awesome because you get free candy
97. I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it
98. I have dated a close friend's ex
99. I'm happy as of this moment

Ornery

So I am feeling a bit ornery today. Basically speaking my mind and being my normal sarcastic self.

I suppose this could be a negative thing at work, but oh well. :)

I guess the real thing is that I am tired of pretending to be someone different at work than when I am not at work. I have been being myself a lot since my revelation, with minor speed bumps, and it has been going rather well.

I knew eventually someone would notice me for who I am and not the meek fake person I had been. In any event, I got some good dancing and some smooches in last night when I went out. Good times. :)

Anyway, plans are for us to dance on Saturday. I told her about the 80's thing on Thursdays and Saturdays and we pinky-swore that we would meet up there. We'll see how it goes. :)

The great thing is that I am not worried about what's going to happen or going through any weird imagination scenarios that I had in the past. It is what it is and if something comes of it great, if not I got a couple feels and some kisses and a good time.

I should continue to focus on being myself. My friends enjoy my company because I am not fake around them. Go me! :)

Anyway, so I, at least today so far, am taking this egoist attitude to work with me and see how it goes.

I am not a rude person but I have no plans on holding back who I am for anyone.

MGB: I think the selfishness I told you about is better termed egoist, so you were pretty much right on the money. :)

4 alarm fire!

Ok, so I get woken up AGAIN from the fire alarm in my building.

Luckily I was almost awake, it was 6:30am in the morning, I went to bed early, I had taken a shower last night and was pretty much ready to go to work early anyways.

What is upsetting is that it is the second time in less than 2 weeks.

Not sure what it was, but the fire department was there already when I left to go.

I had time to rub the sleep from my eyes, rush to put my clothes on, get all the stuff back in my pockets (keys, wallet, smokes etc) that I took with me snowboarding, and then rush out the door.

No normal morning smoke, no normal reading of blogs/web comics, no normal shit/shave/shower, gah!

Ah well.

All I hope is that I have an apartment to go back to when I get out of work, though I didn't smell any smoke or burning anything this time and the fire dept was pretty prompt.

Well, at least the alarms have batteries in them!

Snowboarding

So I just got back from snowboarding with MGB. I had a lot of fun and I plan on doing it a few more times and hope it all sticks. If I get good I will now have a winter sport. :)

I am a bit sore but no more than doing any other physical activity.

I am officially a first timer. :)

We went to Sunday River and I took the First Timer class. I learned a lot of what not to do and am learning what to do too.

The hard part wasn't really remembering what to do or not to do but making my body do it. I had a tendency to lean too far forward and I also scrunched down a bit too much, but all in all it went well.

I did have some spectacular diggers, half were caused by me trying to heel too fast to change direction, the other half was me trying to avoid unsuspecting skiers.

I got the whole slight turns thing really well, so I got some good speed and good control, but when I started going faster than I thought I should, I would try to change direction to a slower back and forth type thing. Not so good when scrunched down trying to heel and leaning forward. :)

I am very proud of myself that I didn't get frustrated and I did have a few good short runs. The whole stopping thing I finally got when I was getting toward the bottom of the hill.

MGB was very supportive and gave me some good pointers. Thankfully she got in a lot of runs while I was taking the class. Thanks again for taking me! :)

Anyway, just thought I would throw up something about it before I went off to shower and maybe take a nap.

Wish me luck next time. :)

Iceland

I have been reminiscing about Iceland.

Mainly because it is blizzardy outside but I have a picture of the Vestmannaeyjar islands that I bought on my computer. It is a nice painting print from a local artist. And like you should know by now, I support artists when I can, even local Icelandic ones. :)

I also bought a clay drunk puffin with a bottle of Brennivin, a local schnapps, aka "Black Death". Yum. :) The puffin was made by an ex-patriot Canadian who was also friends of an ex-patriot American I met there. Good people. She makes good pizza too. :)

The other drink that was popular was Hot and Sweet, a dark licorice liquor that burned going down but had a nice after effect, even though it tasted like licorice. :) Not a big fan of licorice, I must say, but liked the Hot & Sweet.

Anyway, I am reminded of the 3-day festival I attended and rather enjoyed myself, debauchery and all. :)

Let me see if I can show you the name of the festival (pauses a few moments while writing to get the right font): þjóðhátið (pronounced Thee-awth-ha-teeth)

Ah, I miss that language. It is so complex but makes a lot of sense once you get used to it. :)

Needless to say, I plan on going back for festival in the next few years (I hope). It is the first weekend of August and is a blast. Plus, I have a place to stay there if I so choose. Go me! Eva and Pauli are good people and were fun to hang out with.

I guess finding the 3 weeks that I would want to spend there will be the hard part, though I think I could get away with 2 weeks and this time around I can go check out the fjords to the NW of the island, after, of course, the festival.

And I sure wish there was some Müsli and Skyr for breakfast around here...yum!

And the trip to Bláa Lónið (Blue Lagoon) was unforgettable.

Ah...too many things to try to explain as to why I want to return!

þakka fyrir og góða nótt!

He's got the beat

Sorry for the bad pun but somewhat appropriate. :)

So I have been thinking a bit about my music life and not getting too far into it as far as making my own music. Mainly I am not really musically inclined. But enough about that, let's take a different tack.

I said I wasn't musically inclined as far as notes and chords and all that. I try and I get a faint grasp of the whole concept, but mostly it is secondary to what I really feel.

I feel the beat. I am truly a drummer at heart. I have great rhythm and keep time very well. I think not in music but in percussion.

I hear the underlying message in music that is not necessarily conveyed in the musical instruments but in the drums that make the song alive. Most music cannot function without it's core, and that's the drums.

And that is what I am, a drummer.

So that leads me to only one conclusion. I need to get a new set.

Did I mention how I lost my last one? Probably not.

So about 5 years ago I was staying in an apartment not far from where I live now with a few buddies of mine. We played music together and it was fun. Eventually it died because of the Yoko factor but that's neither here nor there.

In any event, I kept my drum set in the basement. I had to clean it off from dust once in a while because I didn't have a place to keep it up. Or at least couldn't play it in the apartment.

So my friend asked me to leave because a Japanese friend who stayed in the room where I was living and he was returning for 6 months or so and I knew this would happen when I took the place. I was there for 2 years or so and it was time to move on. So I found a new apartment but it had little room. I guess that's what you get for only looking for a week and not having too much time to move out.

Anyway, as you can see, I kinda lost track of my set. I had so much going on that I couldn't move it because I had no place to put it, and I figured it was ok to leave it there for a while since they were gonna be there anyways.

Well, go fig, eventually they moved out when I didn't hang with them as often. And since I hadn't been playing for a while, I forgot about it. Out of sight out of mind is how things are with me sometimes and that was the case this time.

Presumably it is gone, but I wonder sometimes if I could go over there and check out the basement and see if it was still there. If so, take it back. If not, then that's what I expected.

I think I would have a hard time explaining myself if I got caught.

"Oh, yeah, I lived here about 5 years ago and was just checking the basement for my drum set."

I am sure that would go well. :)

Anyway, I think I might start pricing a new set. I think I can find room in my new place for it if I lose one of the couches (one which is new as of 2 weeks ago). Or maybe a table.

Not sure the neighbors would like it much though. I tend to get a little loud with it. :)

Needless to say, if I can find a place for the set I definitely will want to get back into playing. I find it is a good release unlike trying to learn keyboards.

Ah well, we'll see what happens.

If I truly want to start playing again, I WILL find a place to play.

Spring Fever

So I am starting to get spring fever, and unfortunately it is a few weeks too early.

I really want to get back outside on a regular basis and go biking and playing basketball.

I am gonna try out rollerblading but it has been a while since I have skated on anything.

Luckily I have good balance thanks to a few years of tae-kwon-do and I am not too worried about it.

AZ has concerns about me trying it out but oh well. :) We discussed it last night but he doesn't know me well enough when it comes to athletics as I know about myself.

Basically it comes down to perception.

I have spent years trying to portray an image of an overweight hick, even down to the flannel. I think the main reason I did that was because I had a lot of self-doubt and if I gave people the impression that I was a good-for-nothing dumb person, when they got to know me, they would be surprised and I would get a boost out of fooling them.

Don't ask me why I did it, mainly I was being pathetic and too self-conscious to show my real self and was worried about how I was perceived.

In reality, I am athletic and am a physicist. :)

Thankfully, I am not like that any more. I still have some extra weight that I am trying to get rid of and have already shed 60 lbs over the last year. Still a little ways to go but once spring hits, it should peel off nicely. Not literally hopefully. :)

Anyway, my whole self-image thing has vastly improved now that I am being more selfish and I really want to look as good as I feel. So I definitely can't wait for spring to arrive so I can do go some sports and stuff.

I am also hoping to try out snowboarding and see how I like it. If I like it, I will have some sporty thing to do over the winter next time around, and whatever is left for this winter (which may be a while yet).

Perhaps next fall I will be excited about the snow falling...we'll see.

Just waiting for MGB to get back to me...next weekend maybe? I think we need to give a 3-day heads-up to Sugarloaf for that package, but not sure. Lemme know! :)

Snow Driving

So we got dumped on again with more snow and it amazes me at the stupidity of the drivers around here. You would think years of practice would get them to drive better but I guess not.

There are three kinds of drivers:

A) Those who drive too fast and slip and slide all over the place. These are the people who end up in ditches and telephone polls or go careening into other cars while trying to make a turn. I saw a vehicle in a snow bank, a 4WD SUV no less. Stupid fucking idiot.

B) Those who drive too slow. They ride their brakes and slip and slide every time they do. It also causes those behind them to have to do the same thing or run into the back of them. I saw an accident where someone backsided someone else tapping their brakes too much. Stupid fucking idiot.

C) Then there is the rest of us. We know that by changing acceleration quickly (braking is negative acceleration) it will cause slipping and sliding and most likely cause an accident. Using a constant velocity will dramatically decrease your chance of an accident. Go us!

The problem really is there are more of those other types then sensible drivers. They are the ones you hear causing the 20-40 car pile-up on the highway. Or they are the ones found in a ditch and stretches AAA and emergency crews abilities to the limits.

So avoid driving in shitty conditions if possible, and if not then be aware of the stupid fucking idiots trying to get there as fast as possible or the ones who are hitting their brakes way too often.

*hopes for spring soon*

Good Morning! Not...

So I am just coming back in from my wonderful fire alarm that woke me up about an hour ago in my building.

It is interesting to see how people react to being sent out into the cold in the middle of the night. Some are quiet (me cause I am tired) and others are loud and obnoxious. Either that or they are that way anyways.

I suppose it is an interesting way to meet your neighbors if you haven't already. I found out there are 4 cute women who live on my floor, #2 and #3. Apparently they are 2 sets of roommates but you never know in Portland.

Anyway, I suppose I could use that in the next few days as a way of stopping by and meeting them. Or I could just let it pass. We'll see.

Is it weird that I am thinking about dating when my building could have gone up in smoke, or more fire?

Not really. :) I am weird like that.

Oh, and about the fire. There wasn't one but apparently the elevator had had an issue with a belt or something and may (haven't verified yet) plummeted to the basement, which set off the alarm. The wonderful smell of molten rubber is wafting through the stairwell as we all came back inside.

Needless to say, I am tired and need to go to bed.

Good morning indeed.

Silk

I love silk.

I decided to wear one of my silk shirts to work today and I can't stop myself from feeling myself up. :)

Plus I have found a great formula that seems to hold true:

Wear silk shirt = get more hugs

I have found that looking good and feeling good gets a lot more attention then wearing just a T-shirt or some other drab clothing (which I do lounging around the apt).

I love the feel of it on my skin and I love having other people feel it. I guess I like being felt up. :)

My friend suggested I invest in silk boxers or boxer-briefs. I am afraid all I would do is walk around a lot and let the silk rub up against my...never mind. You get the idea. :)

And I love when women wear silk, I guess it is one of my fetishes. Not a big fan of lace though, it chafes. :)

Anyway, I plan to go out tonight and get some more silk shirts to add to my growing collection. I am not much of a shopper but I like to go out and feel shirts, heh. Thankfully they are not being modeled so I don't have to worry about offending anyone.

I have tried some of the microfiber shirts and I have a few of them but it is just not the same.

Ah well, back to feeling myself up at work. ;)

Mixed Emotion Day

I am not sure exactly how I am feeling today. It's not anger, I rarely do that any more. It's not upset, nothing to be upset about. It's not happy, I know happy and this is not it. :)

I think it is sort of a sad, discontent, wanting, needing, almost helpless feeling. But it is more than that, it is like I am supposed to be doing something, not knowing what it is supposed to be. I know it is important and I know I need it or at least want it. It's not about someone in particular, or about anyone for that matter.

I am not sure how to express it, I know that I should and want to but am not sure how. This is a feeble attempt. And the sad thing really is that there are people who read my blog regularly and, at least this time, I am concerned about what they think of it.

No need to worry, just it feels like I want to give a message to everyone out there, and that no one really is going to read it. And for those that do will just try to help when there is no need to help. Or it will be someone I want to read it and will and then I will not hear from them again. Hate that.

Yesterday was a funk day, and I think this is day two. I am feeling a bit self-conscious about how I look and how people perceive me. I know, it shouldn't matter, but reason and logic can only take someone so far.

I am an emotional person. I freely admit that. I don't go to extremes in any direction but I tend to circle around happy more than anything else but sometimes the scale gets tipped a bit toward the other direction and I have to feel that.

I think to really appreciate the happy or content emotions you have to know the sad or discontent moments. If everything was happy happy joy joy all the time it would be so common as to be boring or even bad for you, change your medication!

Maybe I am anxious for spring and for this stupid winter to be over. I am so tired of not being able to go outside and do things. I am very active during the spring, summer and fall that being so inactive during the winter I get all depressed and stuff sometimes.

I make the best of it by hanging with my friends but even that won't do it sometimes. I want alone time sometimes but I really want alone time with someone to snuggle with. Not really alone is it? Ah well, it's an odd day.

And sorry AZ, if you read this, for not calling you back. I got so wrapped up in being angsty that I ignored everything and everyone else.

So what is the meat and potatoes of this thread. That I should delete this stupid post because it allowed me to express myself while writing and am feeling better. Blog therapy...hmm.

Please don't consider this my normal state or who I really am, it's just me being myself, by myself, when I am not interested in doing anything else that I normally enjoy doing. Heck I am even listening to sappy 80's soft rock which I never do, but I couldn't find any angsty goth to listen to. Need to find more of that heh.

Wow, this post is getting long and I should stop, but I am getting better by doing free-thought diarrhea of the mind that I am currently doing. Maybe I'll go watch a movie or just go play a game or something.

Or better yet, maybe I should just go to bed so I can get a great early morning start! Yeah right. Like I really look forward to going to work. It's not all bad but it's no picnic on a sunny summer afternoon under the big maple tree with my girl eating finger sandwiches and drinking wine looking out at the rolling hills and the mountains in the distance.

Did I mention I am a romantic? Maybe, but that's neither here nor there.

If you stayed with this post this long then you must think I am wacko. Well I am, but in the good way. :)

Ok, I think I am over it now. Thanks for playing and wasting your time reading my blog. Hope it didn't suck so bad that you will never return!

And if you don't return then I can't stop you, but you will miss out on the exciting next installment of my life!

*cough*

That was a joke, get it? ;)

The only way to change how you feel is to just do it!

Sit-Com and the Blog Voice

Sounds a bit like "Chico and the Man" but not quite.

I am a situational comic and I am disappointed a bit that this doesn't come across on my blog.

After going back and reading a few of my posts, it seems like I am a rather bland and depressed person. I am far from it!

I thrive in conversation when it comes to my "off" brand of humor. I can take intended meanings of conversation and give it just a slight nudge in a different direction to make it completely different but with just about the same wording.

It is also about flow and presentation style. Most of the time, these things click, depending on the audience, but sometimes they fall flat on their face. Such is the life a sit-com actor. Canned laughter and all. :)

Why am I decomposing this aspect of myself? Mainly because it is a big pile of compost in the blog.

I rarely have had the opportunity to "chat" on my blog. It is really not the right medium, and I think in general the anonymous and impersonal nature of the internet is to blame. Either that or I don't translate well into binary.

I hope glimpses of my humor come through on occasion and I often use smiley faces to convey that I am being sarcastic or not serious even though the sentence could be conveyed as being from a malicious or bad place. Either that or I am smiling as I right it and couldn't help but convey my humor with it.

That's why I enjoy going out and hanging with my friends. It allows me to spread my good cheer and bad puns like an infectious disease, only not so viral. :)

I guess the subtleties of my humor are not found in my blog voice as often as I like and I am completely devastated that anyone would ever think anything like I am a humorless hunk of coal. [Insert smiley face here]

Ok, one for the road...

:)

Self Awareness

No one said it was going to be easy.

Days go by when I feel like king of the land, other days I am the fool.

Which one is correct is up to interpretation I suppose, but I silence the negative voices from outside and focus only on the inside voices. And no not those kind of voices. :)

The power of positive reinforcement is wonderful. But it is empty if you do not feel it yourself. Like I said, sometimes I can feel it in myself and other times not so much.

It's not that I am neurotic or am actually worrying about what others think of me, but self doubt can be a powerful voice. Perhaps I am listening to the old voice and not letting the new voice out of its muzzle. Or perhaps I am just tired. The excuses could go on forever. :)

The old adage and one that holds true today keeps me secure in that what I think most of the time is the only way to think: Know Thyself.

I have come to know myself in such a better way these last few months that I actually believe the positive reinforcement I get from others. :)

Forgive me my transgressions in bringing this subject up once again. Perhaps I am a bit of a narcissist that I like to hear feedback on how wonderful I am. Can never hear too much of that, if it is sincere. Though saying it to the same person too often will make it lose its luster.

Ah well, I am ready to go dancing and shake this mini funk out of my system. Hope to see those who go out out there. If you know you should but don't, shame on you, I like to talk with you! :)

ttfn

Wrong Way Up The One-Way Street

Wrong Way Up The One-Way Street

The clouds above me sway in the breeze
As I sit under my tree
The branches form many shapes
And I ponder as to their origin

The sun shines dimly in the night sky
As the moon blinds me if I stare too long
And its rays of moonlight warm my skin
And I burn under its heat

I relish the softness of the granite under my feet
And grab strands of it between my toes
My forehead is bleeding
After the clump of grass hits me between the eyes

I swim in the lava, so refreshing
It's molten droplets drip down my face as I come up for air
But I must duck under once again
To not be seared by the rain

Is it dream or reality that is life?
Is it real to be the only one who can change the world at a whim?
Or is it a dream to be stagnant and unable to move the earth?
When I wake up, I will let you know

Causality

I think there is a flaw in causality and this has a dramatic effect of things that can go faster than light (FTL).

First off, I believe that the distance between two events has a major impact as to how fast things can go without worrying about the cause and effect paradox. Let me explain a little.

Suppose there was a ship that could travel FTL and goes to a nearby star, say 4 light years. From the observation of Earth, the ship speeds up and eventually disappears as the speed increases past the speed of light. Essentially the local photons bouncing off the ship onto the observer on earth are greatly diminished in quantity as it speeds away, eventually going toward zero.

What really would be happening is that the photons coming off the ship still are limited by the speed of light and therefore would come in eventually when they travel the distance form where the ship was at the time of it coming off the ship and then traveling to the observer on earth.

So what happens when the ship arrives at the star. Well, to the observer on the ship, as they approach the destination, more photons will hit the observer and thus will have an increased view of what is happening at the star they are approaching. Basically they will have a fastforward view of the previous 4 years that the star was emitting its light. Most likely distorted by the Doppler effect.

Anyway, when they arrive, they are now slower than the speed of light and hence everything that happens and all the photons that bounce off it will be sent out to the universe as normal.

Now for causality. The observer on Earth will, after 4 years, see (with a sufficiently powerful telescope or measuring device) the events of what happen at the ship's destination star. Because it took that long for the photons to arrive here.

The issue with cause and effect that I say is flawed is that, even if the ship returns before those 4 years back to earth, the cause of those photons at the other star has already happened. It happened to the ship and the crew. So, just because the observers on earth don't actually see what is happening at the star at the time that the crew is doing it (different frame of reference), the effect will be seen when the photons arrive.

If, on the other hand, the ship stays at this new star for 4 years and were observing earth, then they would see their launch from earth. But at some point along this observation it will diminish to near zero while they are watching since the photons that had bounced off during their journey as they approached this new star would have already been seen by the ship 4 years ago. But this time, the approach of the photons as observed by the ship would be in reverse.

The cause and effect would not be changed, just the observation of those effects.

So basically, in a nut shell, the limitations put forth by General Relativity and the universal "speed limit" are merely an observational limitation. You would not see the effect before the cause, i.e. from the perspective of the ship, because the thing that traveled FTL was the cause and thus seeing the reversed "ghost" images of itself once it arrived at the new star are merely the limitation of the photons themselves. In other words, the observation is limited but the cause and the effects are unchanged, just the sequence of observations of the cause.

If the cause was the ship traveling FTL to the new star, then it obviously had to have done it before it arrived at the destination for the observer on the ship to see itself launch.

It's the distance that is traveled that makes this seem paradoxical. What would happen if the ship traveled 1000 light years. Neither the observer on the ship nor the observer on earth would even know, in their lifetime, about the other at all. And thus the cause and effect paradox would not even be an issue.

So things could be zipping around the universe at FTL speeds and we would be none the wiser. How that is achieved is another matter altogether but the need for a better understanding of the "speed limit" needs to be examined.

Perhaps the investigation of the "instantaneous" effect of gravity will help shed light, pun intended, on the matter, more puns. :)

Dancing

So I just came back from Asylum and I pretty much danced the whole night.

I am a little sore and a bit sweaty but I had a great time.

I find great pleasure in dancing. It is one of those releases I've been talking about. It allows me to express myself through my motions and I enjoy moving to the music.

I am a courteous dancer. Basically that means that if there are few people on the floor I can take up a lot of space but when more people are there I "small" dance. Basically move around where there is room.

I am not the type of guy to intrude on someone's dance space, especially women. If they are inclined, they are welcome to come into my space, of course, and I dance with them. I know a lot of the women at the club and I am a safe person to put between me and "that" guy.

You know the type. The one that comes off the sidelines and just starts grinding or at least intruding. I am a good blocker generally and they can use me for assistance if they don't feel like getting off the floor.

Anyway, I met several nice women tonight who I danced with and several that "intruded" on my space from time to time. Good times. :)

In any event, I dance for myself, regardless of who is there or who is watching. If I like the song, I dance. If I don't, I stop unless asked to stay. Simple as that.

I guess it is a way to put myself out there for any potentials that may be interested and it also allows me to show my stuff, so to speak. :)

I have been told I dance well, so I have shed any self doubt months ago.

I am really starting to enjoy the "no worries" approach to dating/women now that I have finally got over my fear of rejection.

It took a while but I am starting to get it.

Music

So I have been going over my music collection and all the different types of things I listen to. I really like most types of music, though in some genres I am very selective if not disinterested in (like country, hip-hop and classical).

Here is a list of some bands I listen to (alphabetical):

Aerosmith
Alannis Morrisette
Beatles
BeeGees
Cake
Coal Chamber
Cranberries
Dido
Dresden Dolls
Everclear
Fiona Apple
Foo Fighters
Green Day
INXS
Metallica
Midnight Oil
Nine Inch Nails
Queensryche
System of a Down
U2

Ok, I got tired of looking at my CDs but that's just a sample. I am sure I missed many bands but that's a flavor. There are definitely ones that are not on the list and I also enjoy 80's alternative music, you know The Cure, The Smiths, Jesus and Mary Chain, etc. But don't have much of those yet as far as my collection.

Anyway, thought I would at least post something today, have been pretty busy at work in between emails. :)

Collapsing Economy

(Apparently I am on a roll)

Ok, so as you all know, or should know, the war in Iraq is based solely on oil and oil production.

The main reason for taking over Iraq was to gain control of one of the largest known oil reserves in the world.

I had this idea a few years ago when the war was building and others have had the same ideas around that time. It is mainly about the declining value of the dollar against the euro.

Currently, most of the oil bought in the world is bought with US dollars. It is the simple fact alone that gives rise to all the evil things that are happening over in the Middle East.

Saddam Hussein changed the purchase of oil from dollar to euros in 2002, not long before the whole WMD thing started occurring. Iran has also threatened to change it's large oil reserve to euro backed oil as well. North Korea has already done so.

Do those 3 sounds familiar? They are affectionately known as the "Axis of Evil".

With the rise of the euro against the dollar and that OPEC has made overtures to switch from dollars to euros for the sale of oil, the Bushites needed to take a military and economic position on the oil reserve in Iraq. It is intended to prevent the collapse of the US economy if the switch to the euro is ever to take place.

The Bushites are trying to topple OPEC and its price controls by flooding the oil market with "free" oil that it gets from the puppet government that has been installed in Iraq.

There are two critical errors that Bush and his neocons have made.

First, by pressuring OPEC into raising prices above $50 a barrel (as it stands now) with its military occupation of Iraq, OPEC for its own protection will most likely switch to the euro. Another reason this will happen is that most European nations really hate the US foreign policy (much more than ever before) but now have the economic strength to do something about it, if it so desires.

The second mistake is that by keeping the dollar in a "weak" position, even though they say otherwise, it will actually force the hand of OPEC and force them to take the euro.

As a side note, Venezuela, an oil producing country and member of OPEC, has already made overtures to change to the euro by itself, and hence the CIA-backed failed coup attempt of the government.

Needless to say, if you are smart, start changing your wealth to the euro in anticipation of this collapse.

Most likely, if Bush decides to attack another Middle East country, say, oh I don't know, Iran, the repercussions will result in an economic collapse much worse than the Great Depression.

My prediction, barring full scale war between the US and Europe/Russia/China, will be the collapse of the US economy within the next two years. Once oil prices reach $55/barrel OPEC will have to change over to the euro.

Some articles to look at:
http://goldmoney.com/en/commentary/2004-02-18.html
http://www.cpa.org.au/garchve03/1127currency.html

Anthropomorphize

(yay big words are fun)

Anecdote:

So I was out smoking this afternoon and the wind was blowing snow off the roof on to the "bus stop" smoking area.

I joked, "Great, more snow."

Someone says, "Yeah, Nature doesn't like the snow here, so it's putting it over here."

So he anthropomorphize the wind and the snow as some sort of being called Nature and was giving it human qualities. Basically, without realizing it, he made something naturally occurring event into a human-like being that has thoughts and deeds and desires of its own.

I have noticed that I tend to do that a lot as well. I imagine when I see an old rusted out car on the side of the road as being sad that it is no longer being used for its original purpose. Just slowly decaying and dying with no one to care about it any more.

I gave the car feelings and emotions, without realizing it. Until now of course. :)

So what am I trying to say?

Well first off, humans are very, very selfish. We are so anthrocentric that all things revolve around us. We are damaging the earth, we need to help dying species, we imagine there is an all powerful being directing our little existences for a grand purpose.

The ancient Greeks took this to a big extreme. All things natural were given a deity to watch over it. They were jealous gods and goddesses and had a direct effect on the world and the people.

That hasn't changed much. Now it is some all powerful being, either God, Allah, Yahweh, The Goddess, or any number of theistic tendencies.

Things we try to understand and can't are given the monicker of godhood. If we are unable to understand then, being so anthrocentric, give it human qualities so we can try to grapple with understanding.

Science, for the most part, is not like this. But in situations where we don't understand something or understand it limitedly, a new religion is formed based on limited evidence or inability to experiment.

No one knows the true nature of light, we just experiment and try to figure it out. Is it a particle or wave? It has qualities of both depending on how the experiment goes.

What is the speed of gravity? It is taken for granted that it acts, for all intents and purposes, instantaneously. But General Relativity prevents anything from happening faster than the speed of light. So which is right? Depends on what religious camp you are in.

So to wrap this post up, think of all the things that exist, all the forces and ideas that are out there and see if you, or anyone, anthropomorphizes it.

Is there a way for us to figure out the real truth or are we so limited in scope that we cannot get past out anthrocentrism?

Release

So I have been trying to find ways to release my creative energy and I have come to realize that the one that I thought was a good one, isn't really.

I had thought, and it may have been true in the past, that music was my release. I have come to realize that I am really not that creative when I play music. I used to play drums a lot. I got many of my aggressions out and came up with some good beats, but technically it isn't music, it is more rhythm.

I have been teaching myself the piano and I am not very good. Sure I can play a short bit of some songs that I like, but I am not very creative when it comes to making my own stuff. It could be that I am not familiar enough with the instrument to do it right but I am not really that motivated it seems.

I also learned to play the recorder and the tin whistle (some). I enjoying playing it, but I am a smoker so wind instruments aren't really my thing either. I can make stuff up and it kinda sounds ok but not really music per se.

Anyway, my real releases are my poetry, good and bad ones, and dancing. I am able to just release myself into the beat and just go to town.

Don't get me wrong, I totally love music but I think because I hardly ever listened to music until I was in 8th grade I never got the firm foundation of music and melodies that many others have.

And the other thing is, I don't really pay attention to the performers of the music that much. I know the names of band members of bands I really really like. Otherwise whenever my friends are talking about songs or names of bands or band members, I am pretty clueless.

Ah well, guess I am not really meant for music. I am more of a harmonizer than a lead by far. Maybe I should get drums again...

I have music in my soul, and that's pretty much where it's going to stay.

Honesty and Accountability

Those two words currently do not apply to our government. On any level.

Why is that?

These things aren't new, they have been around for a while, yet they are rarely used, if ever, where the government is concerned.

If the people really found out what their government does, there would be a revolution. Some of us know a little bit about what it does, some even more, but most people don't or even worse won't.

The government takes money from the people, part of our social contract, and is supposed to use it for the security and safety of the people who put it into place. It is this willing allowance we give to the government that is supposed to take care of those who cannot take care of themselves or to protect everyone in society. Of course, right now, it is not a willing allowance, it is a required debt, in most cases, and is vehemently enforced.

In any event, the government wastes most of the money it is given on petty shit. The money is used to further some personal agenda and to keep them in the power that we allow them. By subterfuge and outright lying, they say and do whatever keeps them in power. And the problem is, no one is keeping them accountable for their actions.

Sure, there are some groups trying to keep them honest, but because it has so much money that they have taken from us and used for these means, it is difficult for these small groups to uncover everything that the government is hiding.

But if the people really knew, this government would fall.

The problem: Fear.

The propaganda machine that the government runs keeps most people in fear all the time. Fear of people who are different. People "over there", people who look different, people who act different, people who disagree with us, people who have more/less money then us, people who have power over us (politically, religiously, monetarily, socially, forcibly).

People are kept in a perpetual state of fear so that the government can obfuscate all the evil things it is doing to us and to other people around the world.

We need to apply, all the time, every moment, honesty and accountability on everyone who has power to make, judge, or enforce laws. Everyone in the government, everyone with power has to be held accountability for what they say and do. It is our right to know what the government does in our name and it is our right to get rid of any government that does not do what it is supposed to do, or does things it should never do.

So every time you hear a politician talk, it is a lie. Every time a politician does something, they are not accountable.

This HAS to change or we will fall into such a fear-filled state that we will either die in droves in misery or that it will annihilate us and everything on this planet.

Change the world, one truth at a time.