Gentleman

What is it about me that makes me compelled to remain a gentleman around people (women in particular). Is it my need to fool myself into believing that is what women want or is it something that has been taught to me over years of institutionalization?

Perhaps it is just that it makes me feel good to treat people with respect whether earned or unearned and that allows me to feel comfortable around new people?

But the thing is, I don't always feel this way. I have carnal feelings just like every other person (and anyone that tells you different is trying to "teach" you something).

I suppose I am just angsty right now for not following my instincts completely and allowing only part of myself to show through in hopes that that is what she wants to see.

I suppose I should just say and do what I feel without infringing on her self (mainly because I am not like that). So I guess we'll see where this part of my introspection takes me.

Wish me luck heh.