What am I doing?

Hi :)

I am still curious as to why I am doing what I am doing and not doing something different or something more. I think I have a few things I still need to work out with myself - some old agreements that I don't agree with any more.

I still want to change and be all great and stuff, yet sometimes I just want to relax and not do much of anything. I am motivated often to do things I like to do, yet by some definitions, I am not doing much of anything.

I feel that by focusing on what I want and what I want to experience, it will happen. So far so good. I just wonder if there are some things I am trying to accomplish that are either not my own or are compromises to what I really want. Maybe they are based on trying to please other people over myself or simply not being clear in my own mind about what I really want.

Either way, I suppose it is just a matter of patience and practice to get where I want to go. If I don't feel like doing something, I am sure I can find something fun to do in the mean time. :)

Wish me luck!